Maybe it’s the woman thing. Maybe it’s my personality. Maybe it’s the biorhythm.
Whatever the reason is, my mood swings in a quite wide range. Someday I am so positive, sharp and confident. Someday I am kind, loving and patient. Someday I am cranky, critical and hysterical. Or very sensitive and overreacting. Or just unfocused. Someday I feel great, another day I feel terrible.
Since I started my business, I have considered all my talk on this website as the publicity, the advertisement of what I am trying to sell.
When you sell something, usually you talk about the good part of it. Okay, I am selling the ‘good stuff’ for your life. Probably I should talk about the benefits of healthy eating and represent how I am having a wonderful life thanks to it. Look at me, as I am eating well, I am having a happy life!
But, is the life all so wonderful? If you are honest, the answer should be absolutely ‘No’. We, ordinary people including myself, all have a bad day.
I was having a bit of emotional up and down in the last few weeks (don’t ask me why). I regularly read 4 things as my guides – 3 Japanese blogs and 1 book, Dr. Covey’s ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’. They usually give me the inspiration, new perspectives, reminders and other positive input. But when I was emotionally rebellious, all those positive words just didn’t fit me. Many part of what they say was so right but my emotions didn’t take it. For example, one day I was with someone who’s been sick. He said something but I couldn’t understand so I asked what he said. Then he replied ‘Forget it’. I was upset as it sounded quite rude. I asked what he said because I wanted to understand him, but he simply dismissed it. Okay, Dr. Covey, I tried to understand him before I wanted him to understand me, but he didn’t give me a chance! If he doesn’t want to talk, what can I do? Yeah, yeah, I hear you, I need to build up the emotional bank account. He is sick and tired. I shouldn’t take his irritation personally. I should give him the ‘emotional air’ to breath. But isn’t it unfair that it seems it’s always me who is treated like a crap but still expected to be nice and kind to others? Or is this because I am still trapped by my own paradigm?
At least I managed not to say a word to the man because in my brain I perfectly know there is no point and benefit to pick a fight with him. I understand his attitude was not to hurt me intentionally. I know him and still like him after all. And I often become very sensitive with other people’s attitude. It’s almost like my weakness but also a great occasion to learn about myself. So, instead of trying to fix him, I focused on my own feelings and emotions. Eventually I calmed down and here I am, writing the blog based on the experience!
After I went through my inward dramas, I came to a conclusion. Everyone has a bad day. I believe even Dr. Covey did! We see all sorts of positive thinking and inspiring words, but those who say such thing should have a bad time here and there. Like a doctor who gives you a great advice to take care of your health commonly has a lot of health problem, a life ‘teacher’ still can’t control his life so perfectly. Actually my friend said if someone can do it, she is not a human but Buddha.
So, going back to what I am trying to sell question, I came to the answer. I sell myself, my observation of the life honestly and openly including positive and negative, more accurately the real elements that are often categorized as positive or negative. Emotional up and down is normal, natural and nothing negative. Fear, frustration, withdrawal, aggressiveness and overreactions come to everyone more or less. You don’t want to punch people or kill yourself due to such impulse. To avoid the ‘extreme reaction’, however, first you need to admit such emotions, feelings and impulses exist within you.
We all have a bad day, so what!? After I go through my emotional storm, what I feel is the appreciation for those who are still putting up with me. I call that’s a good sub product of being moody.
When you have a bad day, instead of feeling bad about it, get out of it as much as you can. The hysterical, rebellious or miserable time is a great occasion for you to see a part of real ‘you’.
It is okay.
Have a great bad day. Be difficult. I also have such an uneasy day.